Meg Griffin
Megatron (formerly Megan) "Meg" Semanstein Griffin is the oldest child of Lois and Peter, the older sister of Chris and Stewie. In The Real Live Griffins, she is portrayed by Other Meg. Biography Conception and Birth Megan Semanstein Mcfinnigan was accidentally born in Quahog, Rhode Island as the unwanted, first-born child of Lois Mcfinnigan, the involuntary mother, and Peter Mcfinnigan, the abusive father. Lois and Peter both agreed to never have children, but their plans were ruined when the condom broke one time, while having sex. It is generally believed that Lois was having sex with Peter at this time, but in actuality, Lois got pregnant with Meg. After the pregnancy scare, Peter and Lois thought that this baby came from him, The two of them went through a huge argument over getting rid of the baby. Peter wanted Lois to get an abortion, but Lois was against this. Being put under the pressure, Lois made an attempt at committing suicide, but luckily failed. After 7 months of pregnancy, saying that he got her pregnant. When Lois knew that the baby wasn't a smart child she had another freak out and was actually for getting an abortion this time. Unfortunately, the baby was already in there for 7 months, so it was far too late. After giving birth to Meg, Peter and Lois were disappointed with the results for many reasons. Peter wanted the baby to be a boy, so this was a let-down. Also, due to a weird bodily disfunction, Meg's heart was on her head. The doctor advised them to have her wear a hat all the time, in order to cover that thing up, which is where her pink, squishy hat comes from. When asked to name her, they didn't put any effort into it and "Megan" was the first thing that came to mind. They also made her middle name "Semanstein" which is phonetically pronounces "Semen stain". that they'd hated her, They wrote that on her birth certificate, but as Peter went to give it to the doctor, he got the mischievous idea to change "Megan" to "Megatron", naming her after Megatron from Transformers. Lois accidentally mistook the bucket of her own afterbirth for Meg and drove halfway home with it, before they realized their mistake and came back for Meg, who was about to be thrown in the garbage disposal, by a doctor who mistook her for medical waste. Peter and Lois did not like how Meg put a burden on their lives, forcing them into the joyless epitome that is parenthood, and did not show any respect toward her. Teenage Years Meg currently attends James Woods Regional High School. She is constantly seen trying desperately to be part of the "cool crowd," but is always being shut out of the crowd, mainly by Connie D'amio. Connie is the most popular girl in the school and she is always bullying Meg in order to increase her own, already superior popularity. Meg has constantly been mentioned to be the most unpopular student in the entire school, being hated by everyone for being ugly, gross, boring, unattractive, etc. She does however, manage to have a friendship with a few other girls at her school, who are almost equally as ugly and unattractive as her. These friends would be Patty, Ruth, Esther, and Beth. All of them are ugly girl with curly hair, glasses, pimples, and abusive families, just like her. When Family Guy first debuted in 1999, she was 15 years old and in 9th Grade. She was then turned 16 in the episode I Never Met the Dead Man, where she got her drivers permit. Five seasons later, she officially turned 18 in the episode Returing English. There were no episodes showing or mentioning her 17th birthday before then, but there was a cutaway gag in that episode that flashbacked to her previous birthday, implying that that was her 17th birthday. In the episode Quagmire and Meg, the family celebrated Meg's 19th birthday. Meg's 17th birthday cutaway showed her with her friends, Patty, Ruth, Esther, and Beth, standing around Lois, while she played her Sixteen Going on Seventeen. Lois, being as neglectful and uncaring of Meg as she is, actually didn't know Meg's age as of this birthday, so she awkwardly played the song and mumbles the numbers whenever they came up in song. By doing so, her singing sounded like this. "You are huh-huh going on heh-heh. Fellows will fall in line." Luckily for Lois, Meg was actually 16, going on 17 on this birthday, so the song sounded completely normal to her and she didn't even notice. As of her 18th birthday, however, Meg did find out that Peter and Lois didn't know her actual age. The two of them went up into her room and tried to make a conversation that would get her to tell them her age, but by doing so, they got her to figure out. Future After being mistaken for a male, time and time again, Meg finally caved in and got a sex-change surgery, officially becoming a man, named Ronald, or "Ron" for short. In "Stu and Stewie's Excellent Adventure", her adult life as Ron was seen, and she would constantly bug her family about being a male. In the same episode, it was shown her reason for choosing that specific name is because she met a boy at the pool, during her teenage years, who had that name and she took a liking to it. Meg would live alone in a crummy old house, with no spouse and no children. She'd spend years trying to land a boyfriend, but would have no luck, whatsoever. As predicted by her father in "Long John Peter", she would become an avid writer of Ugly Betty fanfictions, and would make numerous stories every day. No one would read them and if they did, they'd hate them, as they'd be chock-full of all fanfiction writing sings, such as Mary Sues, self-inserts, blatant SJW propaganda, bulleted personality lists, usage of character bases, generic plots/characters, unoriginality, Brian's writing advice, etc. In "Meg Stinks!", Meg would die from choking on a hot dog. She determined this via internal narration and her death would result in an anti-hot dog eating contest movement, to prevent others from suffering the same fate. The movement left a huge impact on society, and hot dog competitions would quickly go obsolete. Meg's life was surely not forgotten as this was her first ever achievement as a person. To this day, the famous motto "Remember How Gross it was when Meg did it?" still lives on as a common phrase, used by people to warn others of the dangers of eating too much hot dogs too quickly. Appearance Meg is an ugly, short, and slightly fat teenage girl. Her head is a rounded triangular shape, which is the same shape as her mother's. Her nose is also triangular and pointy and looks like her mom's nose too. She has brown chin-length hair that sort of sticks to the sides of her head and covers the sides and back of her head and also the bottom edges of her chin. She wears a pink beanie cap and thick black glasses. She also has a pink shirt with a white collar, a white trim, and white sleeve rims. She wears blue skinny jeans and white shoes. Personality Meg is an unpopular, homely teenage girl who is all alone in the world and never does anything interesting. She has a very low opinion on herself because everyone else has treated her like a nobody, which causes her to feel the same way. She is always being abused and neglected by her family, classmates, neighbors, teachers, and even people who don't even know her. She is a very nice girl and she never does anything wrong, so she has absolutely no reason to be treated this way. She just somehow just manages to serve as a target for all of this abuse. People around her just get the urge to disrespect her for no reason. Being mistreated like this for such a long time had led Meg to dislike herself to an extremely large extent. Meg has no respect for herself or her body and does a lot of gross and humiliating things to herself, that a normal person would never do. She cuts herself, she eats like a dog, she dates inhuman creatures and objects, she keeps her babies in her locker, she gags herself and barfs, she openly admits to weird sexual fantasies, and basically has lost all respect for herself as a human being. Meg initially felt hurt by the things people do to her, but at this point, she rarely even cares anymore and just sees this as the norm. Meg is a desperate teenager who is hardly noticed by her family. Everyone else in her family, especially Peter, doesn't care about her or even love her as a part of the family, often harming her or shoving her face in his butt when he farts. Meg is also frequently the butt of jokes and various bits of bad luck in episodes, seemingly more so than the rest of the family. Out of all the relationships with the rest of the family, Lois, Brian and Chris seem to treat her normally. However, Lois has sometimes been cruel and dismissive towards her daughter. In Wasted Talent, Lois forced Meg to practice the piano through use an ankle bracelet attached to a iron ball and forcibly restrained her when she tried to ask Peter for help. In Model Misbehavior, when Meg compares Lois' childhood bedroom to her own, Lois notes that they were the same except that Lois' contained many trophies and pictures of friends; Lois nearly dropped Joe to his death during a chase through the sewers in Breaking Out is Hard to Do when he asked her to "hold on like I'm your child" and he then quickly added "Not Meg! Not Meg!" after slipping a bit after his previous statement; and after Meg told her mom she loved her during Peter's Daughter, Lois pointedly did not say anything in response. This also shown when Meg was having a difficult time in Stew-Roids, Lois just gave up on her, gave her a pill bottle, a Sylvia Plath book (A depression era novelist/poet who committed suicide and wrote significantly depressing works.), and left the room stating "whatever happens, happens". Relationships Peter Mcfinnigan Peter abuses Meg the most out of every member of the family. Ever since Meg's birth, Peter was disappointed with her being female and has hated her ever since. Even after having two male sons, Peter continued to hate her because of her ugliness. Peter often expressed his hatred by beating her up, shutting her up, farting in her face, insulting her character, forgetting her existence, shooting down her ideas, excluding her from family activities, etc. In some episodes, Peter has shown respect for her. (Road to Rupert, Peter's Daughter, Seahorse Seashell Party, Meg Stinks!, Peter's Sister) However, these moments are always subverted in the end, because the status quo is god. In "Road to Rupert", Peter says that deep down, he truly does love Meg like rest of his family and hates abusing her, because of "peer pressure", he pretends to abuse her in front of everyone else. They had a heartwarming hug, but when Lois came out, he dumped a glass of beer on her head and laughed at her. As he went back inside, he gave a little wink and finger point to Meg, and Meg kind of sighed, because she didn't like this. In "Peter's Daughter", something happened that I can't remember. It's been a long time since I've seen that episode. In "Seahorse Seashell Party", Meg realized it was her place to be abused and got Peter to start abusing her again. In "Meg Stinks!", Peter became best friends with Meg, after all his friends were too busy with random stuff, but Meg had to break off her friendship because he was distracting him from her scholarship, so she willingly put herself back into the abuse again. In "Peter's Sister" it was revealed that Peter's abuse toward Meg, reflects off of Karen's abuse toward him. It's been awhile since I've seen that episode too, so I don't know about that either. Needless to say, Meg's life will always be like this. Lois Mcfinnigan Lois hates Meg and abuses her by showing how much prettier and social she is. She also makes very rude, profane comments toward her, cutting very deep into her feelings, finding out exactly what makes her tick. Lois uncovers Meg's insecurities such as her social life at school, boy crushes, concern for her appearance, internal desires and personal fears, etc. and crudely shames her for them. Lois acts similar to the popular girl at school, which is exactly what she was when she was her age, so she has the subconscious, internal desire to bully Meg. In some episodes, Lois has shown love for Meg (A Fish Out of Water, Don't Make Me Over, and Seahorse Seashell Party), but there's always some kind of loophole or subversion, that sends her back to hating her again. That is literally Meg's entire relationship with her mom. Chris Mcfinnigan Chris makes fun of Meg and acts like a stupid jerk toward her. Meg relates to Chris because they're both very homely, unpopular students, but Chris accepts that he's superior to her, even it's by a very small and miniscule amount. Chris has a few stupid, pervy, fat, annoying, ugly friends, who are just barely more popular than Meg and her eye-openingly small group of horrible friends, so he takes pride in this and just shoots Meg up, like the stupid asshole he is. Yep, no respect from her brother either. Quotes *"Shut up, me." *"I hate you all!" *"I hate you!" *"Oh... my God." *"You don't know anything about me!" *"I'm just trying to fit in." *"I'm so ugly and gross." *"I should just kill myself." *"Sideways for attention, longways for results." *"I'm not a boy!" *"Please go out with me. I'm just trying to make Neil jealous. I promise, I'll pay and everything." *"Alright, alright. Give me Sperm Dumpster." *"I finally get my driver's license and the car gets taken away. How ironic." *"Neil Goldman of Quahog, Rhode Island. I am not interested in dating you and will never go out with you. I do not love you in that way or even like you. Leave me alone. I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!" *"Oh my God, we're gunna die! There's so much of life I haven't experienced. I never even got the chance to be some drunk guy's last resort." *"Oh yeah, I went out with this real nice guy ... whose name is ... Ronnie ... Mitchell- ... -stork ... and he's the captain of the ... Quahog Nostalgialand National Park ... soccer ... ball ... team." Trivia *One specific form of her abuse, has become a famous Family Guy quote and later catchphrase and even a wildly popular internet meme. "Shut up, Meg." First said to her by Peter in the episode Deep Throats, and later used as his catchphrase multiples times over and varied many times. *Her name, "Meg" is actually short for Megatron, being named after the character from Transformers. *Her middle name is "Semanstein", which sounds like "Semen stain". *In "Friends Without Benefits", Meg had a birth defect, where her heart was located on her head. Shortly after birth, Dr. Hartman suggested she wear a hat, to cover that up, explaining the origin of her iconic, squishy, pink beanie cap. *In "A Hero Sits Next Door", Meg says she can't taste salt. *Meg has a musical talent on many instruments. In "Chitty Chitty Death Bang", she learned how to play the drums at age one, in "No Country Club for Old Men", she mentioned taking trombone lessons, in "The Simpsons Guy", Lisa helped Meg discover a hidden talent on the saxophone, and in "American Gigg-olo", she played the cello in the school talent show. *She briefly dated Mayor Adam West in Deep Throats. In Tiegs for Two, it was showed that they still go out sometimes. Following Adam's marriage to Carol, (and needless to say, death), their relationship must now be over. *In the episode "Stu & Stewie's Excellent Adventure", it was revealed that in the future, she will get a sex change surgery, not because she feels like a male on the inside, but because she is constantly being mistaken for a boy, and has just decided that she can't fight it anymore and has to go through with accepting it. Her new name as a boy is Ronald "Ron" Semangayzer Mcfinnigan. *In the episode "New Kidney in Town", Meg revealed that she is homophobic and believes that people choose to be gay. *In the uncensored version of "Chris Cross", Meg admits to being part of a group that "fucks up" Anne Frank's birth home on a yearly basis. *Meg is killed in "A House Full of Peters" and her place is taken by an undercover Russian look-alike. 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